Fitting in...

I tried quite hard to fit in ur group...maybe I tried too hard. From this holiday onwards, I am not gonna change my personality or character just to fit in any group. I will no longer tag along with people who actually dont want my company. I will no longer try to please people just to let them accept me.

Yup, if u all are not going to accept me for the way I am, then so be it. Well, its not an easy stand to make, especially when I am about to join a holiday comm where I will tend to be ostracized and forgotten... I predict a certain degree of loneliness ahead during tech crew...well, anyway, there wasnt a holiday period when I was never lonely...so its normal...

Loneliness really drives a person to do whatever he wants. Ya, no more nonsense talk for me, no more attention seeking behaviours for me. Its time to be the person I want to be, a person respected...

Everyone calls me a moocher...but really, I glady accepted that claim for merely getting attention. I am not really a moocher who just takes and not give. I take but I also give. Sometimes Its not that I go grab everything that is free....but the way I portray myself, I sadly regreted that I ever did such shameful acts of grabbing free stuffs and so on. I did it just to boost my name only.

As u guys can see, I am just another attention seeking brat. This superficial character u see here, is me.

So, this holiday time gives me a chance to redeem myself. A chance to be myself. After the exams, there is this sense of purposeless: I suddenly feel lost. But now, I guess with the amount of time I have, I want to do some serious soul searching: What have I been doing my whole life?